I’ve been finding myself drawn to writing poetry more lately. I’ve always had a passion for it – particularly when I was younger – but as my adult years approached my creativity was replaced by responsibilities. I love that it’s coming back to me.
I was thinking yesterday about how I’ve changed in recent years. Through life experiences (good, and very horrid) my expectations and desires have changed radically.
Particularly in what I thought I wanted in a relationship.
So many things have changed in relation to those expectations – as I realised what was important and what wasn’t.
One of the very small things was that I thought it would be lovely for my partner to also be on Facebook. Mr ISFS used to be on Facebook a long time ago (in a galaxy far far away), but he had a bad experience and deactivated his account. And there is next to no chance he will ever go back.
I actually admire him a lot for that. It’s something that I should do, but so much of my life is entwined with Facebook, including my work.
However I used to wistfully think though how nice it would be to have him on there to support me. I would look at my friends whose partners would comment on their posts with something gushy and romantic, and think that would be so sweet to have that myself.
I realised yesterday though that it’s not something I desire any longer.
I would rather keep that side of my life private, and to tell Mr ISFS how much I love him face to face.
There’s something I have realised – how beautiful it is to have our love kept between us. When broadcast it to the world – it seems (to me) to diminish it somehow.
And these words and this poem formed themselves in my mind:
It also feels so much better to respect his privacy, and not overshare on social media as I have been guilty of myself in the past.
I am by nature a very open and sharing person. And unfortunately that quite often has been my downfall at times. But this time I am really loving being more private about my relationship – it makes it seem even more special and magical.