Everyday Wisdom #77

Listening skilfully is challenging.

To listen fully – with complete attention is a discipline.  It requires attention, practice and resolve.

It requires gentle persistence.  And the ability and desire to get ourselves back on track with our attention wanders.  

And it requires an ability to listen not only to what is being said, but what is not being said.

Listening fully and deeply is something I am very passionate about, and passionate about learning more about .  So in coming weeks I will be exploring this topic further.  I would love to hear your experiences on this topic.

How are you a good listener?  What do you think makes a good listener?  

Be well my friends ♥

 

“The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and be understood. The best way to understand people is to listen to them.”

— Ralph Nichols

 

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11 responses to “Everyday Wisdom #77

  1. One key thing, I believe, is to SLOW DOWN. In so much of our interchange we seem to want to rush on to the next bit. It’s , “I can hardly wait for you to stop talking so I can start.”

    • Oh Ben that is so so true!!! So many people aren’t listening to what is being said because they are already thinking ahead to what they are going to say next. This is something I have been very mindful of in recent years. I just purely sit and listen. I don’t form thoughts or opinions. And surprisingly when it is my turn to speak (as such) I find it interesting that what I have to say can sometimes be quite profound and perceptive. Considering I am not wasting time and “listening energy” in thinking ahead and forming specific statements.

  2. I agree with Ben – We need to slow down. Also- too many distractions. So- maybe find a place where there aren’t any or so many.

  3. you are the person that i need as a good friend, too bad we aren’t in the same area. obtaining a friend who is a good listener, is a great asset. i used to think i was a great listener, until Al progressed more wit his Parkinson’s. Now i have to stop and try to figure out what he is saying, because he always doesn’t realize himself

    • Thank you so much Terry!!! Even though we are far apart, I am always here to listen and be a friend for you ♥. I’ve always really believed in the value of listening, but have been additionally inspired to become a “better listener” thanks to a friend of mine. She is going through a lot of personal problems at the moment, and I have been spending a few hours most days just listening and trying to support her and offer her comfort. And I feel this deep desire to become better at it. If that makes sense. Hence I am reading a book on becoming a better listener, and this has inspired me to write about it 🙂

  4. there are wonderful ideas about varying levels of listening in this link…a continuum from “beyond unresponsive” progressing positively to “resonant.” I found the ideas very helpful. http://lauragraceweldon.com/2011/03/30/how-to-listen-how-to-be-heard/

  5. A good listener knows how to validate someone else’s pain

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