My realisation

I came to a realisation today….

….after a phone call that did not go as I was hoping.

On Friday I spent the day in hospital.  Something that I have done once a year for the past 3 years.

I have more than 20 breast tumours.  

Each year I spend the day in hospital having them measured, and biopsied.  

Today I had a call from the specialist, following up on a biopsy that was done of a new tumour.  She asked me to come back in for a more invasive core biopsy.

It was not the news that I had been hoping for.

And my initial reaction was to panic.  Something I do quite well.  

However I realised something….

I don’t want to go through this.  I mean REALLY don’t want to.  However, there is a positive.  

Each difficult experience that I go through helps me to grow.  It helps to provide me with a greater capacity for empathy and understanding, so that I may help other people.

And already I am looking beyond this.  To how I can help other women in a similar situation.

So for this, I am very thankful.


A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge.
Thomas Carlyle


About istopforsuffering

A page created to help spread love and kindness and positivity. Dedicated to making this world a better place, and making a difference in people's lives.

32 responses to “My realisation

  1. I love your positive attitude.

  2. I wish you good luck for your way.
    A positive attitude is the first step.
    I send you a big smile

  3. I’m glad to see you are trying to approach this in a positive way. That will help your mental well being a lot.
    {HUGS} to you!

  4. Thank you for sharing this news your fear,and your positive attirude about it. I wish for you the best possible outcome.


  5. Oh, I’m thinking of you…and do you remember that lovely post you wrote….”it’ll be okay”….the one you posted in April and I read on a day that I was sad and worried….and how soothing that was for me…well, I ‘m sending my own caring, nurturing, encouragement and healing energy back to you now….from me and all the many many people who care deeply about you and your little family. I’m writing the middle of an email…to my friend Jampa and explaining what’s happening and asking that he add you to his loving thoughts and prayers…and those of the other monks at the monastery….so many of us are wishing you well….for a calm mind and good results…

    • Oh my goodness, Kathy. I am blown away. That is one of the most touching and beautiful things anyone has ever done for me. Thank you!!! With all my heart, thank you. ♥

      • Oh, you’re very welcome…I just heard back from Jampa…he’s very happy to add you to both his and the monastery’s “prayer” list…and he added that if it might help you, he’d be happy if you wanted to email and he’d be happy to write back….when I first met Jampa, I thought that meant “blissful mountains”…but, of course,it’s “blissful emptiness” … : ) so, that’s in case you’re ever interested …he’s very easy going and friendly. ) Wishing you well….you’re in my thoughts and heart….kathy

      • Thank you so so much Kathy!! I have the email address now, so please do delete it. I will definitely get in touch with him, that would be wonderful Love & blessings to you ♥

      • Oh good…I can’t delete it… in my blog, I can click on edit and then change parts of other people’s comments…can you do that? Jampa is extraordinarily kind….a really special person.

      • I have edited to remove his email address. And also sent him an email :-). Thank you Kathy!! Love & blessings ♥

      • Oh…that’s wonderful…I’m so happy you wrote…
        A few months ago, I had made a “page” with the words from a song…when I was so filled with appreciation for a kind friend “mothering” me along…and so I added another background and pass along these words and ideas to you…. : )

      • I just heard from Jampa and he mentioned that he hasn’t heard from you…he was concerned I might have given you a mistaken email address….if you want to write, he’s looking forward to hearing from you…but fine if you don’t.. I’ll try again…I don’t think you need the jampa or that sideways v on either end jampa (again, please delete email address after you receive this : ) )

      • Hi Kathy :-). I did send him an email – have been eagerly awaiting a reply. It’s so kind of him to think of me :-). I will try again 🙂

      • Hi Kathy :-). Could I please check Jampa’s email address again. I wasn’t sure if it was supposed to be included with your last post? Thank you lovely 🙂 ♥

      • oh….what an elusive email address…emptiness indeed : ) If you’d like, perhaps email me and then I’ll directly link you to Jampa’s email address… good things are worth having patience and persistence for.. (btw, when my daughter was 3, 22 years ago, doctors found a benign tumor near my brain…just outside it…I chose to just have it monitored and thankfully it hasn’t grown…ongoing monitoring tests and scans, but it hasn’t grown…but I was terrified at the time….more from the point of view of deep/powerful mother love…my daughter needing her mother until adulthood… than for my own sake..but I did learn to appreciate every day and to be more loving and caring with others too…but it was difficult )

      • Thank you Kathy!!! Have emailed you :-). And removed your email address. ♥

  6. my prayers are with you my friend. what ever the outcome, god is good and he has your best interests at heart.

  7. brendamarroy

    Thinking of you, Megan. Blessings and hugs.

  8. Son

    The internet may have many drawbacks, but it also has so many positives, like making wonderful friends who care. We are all praying for you, Megan, and there is nothing stronger than a prayer chain. May all be well with you.

  9. ZenSoapbox

    Wishing you all the best. Your attitude is amazing! I can only hope to face such things the way you are right now. Thank you so much for sharing. I would normally say, “Be happy and be at peace” at this point, but it seems you already are! -/\-

  10. I stopped in at Kathy – from Pocket Perspective – urging. You are much on her heart and mind. I am joining her and many others to send healing energies your way. May this next, more invasive, biopsy be the bearer of good news only. I am going to hold you in light that all of these tumours will dissolve back to whence they came and that your breasts might be filled with love and light. I’m going to post an grounding exercise that I often share, on my blog, tonight. You might want to practice it if it resonates with you.

    • Thank you so very much for stopping by, and for your beautiful thoughts. I can’t put into words how much that means to me. It has brought me so much comfort. Thank you ♥

      • Megan, Joss is a remarkable “healer” and presence…her blog is filled with beauty…she often writes about “walking in beauty” and spreads beauty, gentleness and love where ever she goes…
        I hope that the nurturing of so many is with you today….and that the beauty of your lovely guided meditation in the forest is bringing steadiness and comfort….warm smiles to you, kathy

  11. You are in my prayers Megan. Love you ❤

  12. Megan, Kathy mentioned you to me and had to stop by to read. Of course my eyes got wet in reading how kindness and love is being sent your way in the midst of your challenge. When I experienced a sudden deafness in April and I was in despair for two days, Kathy and Jampa were a soothing balm for my mind and heart. I truly believe that love with a capital “L” heals because, love is an energy of the highest, and I am happy to say, I got some hearing back. Not out of the woods yet as I hear less, but, I could have stayed totally deaf. BTW, I have an online friend who developed breast issues last year, and though she went for treatments, she refused to see herself as “sick” regardless of what the charts looked like. She knows that thoughts have an influence on our healing. She is in great health now and she attributes it to her attitude, her focus on wholeness, her faith and the prayers sent her way. With all the love being sent your way, your body, mind and spirit is bound to receive healing. Much love to you~ Marie

    • Marie – thank you so much, that truly means so much to me. I am touched by your beautiful words. And my heart aches for you to hear of your battles. I’ve been so honoured by all the support I have received. Much love & blessings to you, Meg

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